Missing last week’s posting schedule was neither planned or accidental. The tango I’ve been dancing doing chemo and radiation every day (M-F) has been daunting.
But I’m doing it.
I’m getting about 2-hours a day to spend with my better half. The rest of each day is either at the hospital, at work or in bed.
But we’re doing it.
Friends and Family want to draw close, but they’re giving me the slack I need to get it all done.
And I am.
My vocabulary has taken on new and uncharted directions. While always a strong advocate for being an involved consumer/patient, I’ve grown fearless and at times, aggressive if I don’t understand what one of my doctors or one of the team members is saying to me. I don’t have time for guesswork.
I don’t wait to know – tell me.
Taking my cue from a co-worker I routinely exchange ‘fun facts’ and general word play, I had a whole essay planned on “insight” being one of the few words in the English language without an antonym. He showed me so on the web. And I believed him…until I did my own research.
He was wrong.
My disease messes with my mind and who I thought I had long ago defined as ‘me’. In the face of all the demands, it’s easy for me to understand the easy slip into everything being about me. My pain is mine. The disease is mine. Being committed to whipping this and living a long and fruitful life? It’s all mine.
Back to outsight. There are all kinds of people involved in everything I’ve described. Because they love me, they have concerns and fears all their own. They know I’m carrying a full load, so they keep those things to themselves.
Good people. They too, are mine.
I’d be a real jack-a&& to lose sight of that (and them). So this week, I leave you with me walking a new trail of learning how to periodically look at things from the outside instead of within. The antonym of internal is external…and the only way to take stock of the external is to go outsight and play.
Lesson in the learning. Done. Thank you.
Sawyer Fredericks – This Fire from the album, A Good Storm (2016)
2015 winner of NBC’s The Voice, Sawyer Fredericks, stopped by the KSPN Aspen studio for another installment of the Kitchen Concert Series. Enjoy an acoustic version of “This Fire.”
Songwriters: Dave Richard Bassett, Sawyer Christopher Fredericks
© WORDS & MUSIC A DIV OF BIG DEAL MUSIC LLC
Banner Coastal Redwood Forest by Eric E Photography is used with permission.
Outsight (Pic): http://lafacultadgamer.com/illidan-stormrage-y-el-blindsight/; Dr. Seuss: http://jeetparekh18.blogspot.com/2014/09/how-to-be-different-part-1.html; Out’Sight by Sylvain Malfroy-Camine ©2018 – See other really good work at: https://www.sylvainmc.com/.